The Sensuality Pitfall, Balancing Hormones and the Mind

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader composed in with a dating problem and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and men utilize love to obtain sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where songs analyze great sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these singles, having sex brings enormous significance and repercussions.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they think sex is a required test of compatibility, (if the sex is good then the relationship will ready also).

B.more frequently, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed songs consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels aside from physical tourist attraction-- such as long-term requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with truth when all those hormones are running wild. Our body responds to somebody we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), that makes the opportunity to have sex with somebody we are attracted to very tough to resist. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical reactions are involuntary and strong , resulting in powerful sensations of attraction, excitement, closeness, wellness, and love .

But when issues develop, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently rationalize by believing, "Well, we've got problems, however the sex is terrific!" They probably would not confess, but they prioritize physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their primary searching tools are sexual destination and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, says that much of his customers have actually fallen under the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys specifically in cities, sex is readily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North states. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical look, motivates sex. If a possible partner is going to be sexually suitable, lots of gay males desire to discover out from the starting. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be good?".

North includes, "I presume this is a ' person' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to mention that chemistry is necessary. Yet, chemistry is a provided that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry take place, though sometimes it can grow over time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication uses off and truth hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This means integrating chemistry with sound judgment. While good sex is important for a sustainable you could try this out relationship, you have to make your partner options by additional info paying full attention to your vision, values, objectives, and requirements -- while feeling all those exciting stimulates!

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